


Forfeit Review

by Punland



Category: Ed Edd n Eddy
Genre: AU, Character Death, Commentary, Dark fic, Meta, Scary Spikender
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-24
Updated: 2020-10-24
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:56:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27055291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Punland/pseuds/Punland
Summary: A review of "Forfeit" by the long-lost author, Scary Spikender. Originally written in 2018.
Comments: 3





	Forfeit Review

And now it is time to talk about what is possibly one of the greatest (and darkest) Ed Edd n’ Eddy fan-fictions of all time: “Forfeit” by Scary Spikender. 

(Unfortunately, as of 2017, the original story has inexplicably vanished along with its creator, but you can read a re-uploaded version of it here: [https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12598784/1/Forfeit](https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12598784/1/Forfeit))

This story is so well-written that I think if the author changed it so that it featured original characters instead of EEn’E characters, and made several edits and revisions, it could actually be a novel. It’s that good. 

Looking back, it’s criminal that this story (at least from what I can remember) didn’t even reach the first page of the most popular Ed Edd n’ Eddy fan-fics. Of course, most of that first page is littered with Kevedd stories. *shudder* But let’s not get into _that_. Let’s talk about the actual story (warning: there will be spoilers!) 

_Forfeit_ is set in an AU (alternate universe) where the Big Picture Show never happened and the characters are now several years older. Now take a moment and think about that. What do you think would have happened in this scenario? Would the cul-de-sac kids naturally have befriended the Eds anyway, after growing out of their immature middle school mindset? Or do you think they would STILL hate the Eds’ guts even as teenagers, and become even more hostile enemies towards them? 

Yeah, it’s clear that the author leans way more towards the latter. 

This is a slow story. By that I mean that the plot moves very slowly, gradually and suspensefully (is that a word? My word processor doesn’t seem to recognize it) building every chapter. If you want a fast-paced, action-packed story, look elsewhere. Nothing really “happens” until the big climax at the end. And yet the plot is so carefully and masterfully structured, each event leading naturally to the next, the atmosphere gradually shifting from light-hearted and _slightly_ ominous at the beginning, then slowly evolving into something more sinister, before becoming full on dark and gruesome towards the end. If you find yourself getting bored as you read the first few chapters because of the lack of action, just trust me and stick around until the end. Believe me when I say that your patience will be rewarded. The final showdown between the Eds and Kankers is quite possibly one of the most intense, violent, and best-written scenes in all of Ed Edd n’ Eddy fan-fiction. For some reason, these two lines stood out to me: “May, Marie, and Lee, all looked at the Eds, and Ed, Edd, and Eddy stared back at the Kankers. An air of silence fell over the room as the two groups of long time enemies simply looked at each other.” They’re so simple, and yet they perfectly capture the resentment that the characters feel for each other, especially the Eds, after the years of abuse they’ve suffered at the hands of their obsessive stalkers.

The harrowing story is rich with dramatic irony. We know all along that the kids are conspiring against the Eds, although it’s not revealed what exactly their big plan is until the end. To be honest, when I first read the story and finally got to the part where they get their big “revenge” on the Eds, it felt like a bit of a let-down. I remember thinking: “That’s it? That’s all they do? Just drug the Eds, throw them into a pool of mud, and take some pictures?” Not that I _wanted_ the Eds to suffer more, obviously, but from all the build-up and elaborate planning, I was honestly expecting something a bit more epic. But then I realized: it’s not so much _what_ they did to the Eds, but the intent behind it. The betrayal. The fact that they went to all that trouble to make the Eds believe that they were finally accepted, only to reveal that it was all a horrible lie, is infinitely more painful than the superficial humiliation the kids inflict on Ed and Double-D. The worst part is this happens _twice_. Earlier in the story, Kevin pretends to be nice to the Eds and even buys them jawbreakers, only to pull the rug out from underneath them. It’s like the old adage goes: “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.” 

Like I said, this is a slow-moving story. Most of the story consists of talking and conversations between the characters. This is definitely a character-driven story. By far the strongest aspect of this story is its characterization. Every character serves a purpose in this story—yes, even Plank. The author does such a good job exploring each character psychologically and really giving us reasons into why they act the way they do, what their motives are for hurting the Eds (in the case of the kids). The story even manages to introduce some pretty interesting subplots. For instance, there’s a subplot involving Jimmy and Sarah, whose friendship is on the rocks after Jimmy attempts to kiss his best friend, whom he has a crush on. Not only does this add some layer to Jimmy’s character, but it also gives him a reason to want to punish the Eds, since he is jealous of Edd because he knows that Sarah likes him. There’s also a very minor romantic subplot between Nazz and Rolf, of all people, and although it’s introduced fairly late in the story, it still adds to the drama. And yes, they do end up happily together, and presumably married, at the end. 

This story also stays true to the show in that there are no adults or any other characters seen outside of the main cast. The author really seems to have put effort into preserving this illusion, which I really appreciate. Another thing I like is how he doesn’t try to “modernize” the show, by setting it in today’s times. There are no cell phones in this story at all, which is a huge relief. While I’m not necessarily opposed to stories that incorporate modern technology into the EEn’E universe, I kind of prefer keeping it in the ambiguous timeline that the original show took place in. 

Of course, like any good story, it has its flaws. Many people have already commented on the (mercifully few) grammar and plot errors, namely the inaccurate portrayal of legal systems and court proceedings, so I won’t go into that. But my two biggest complaints:

The writing style is too wordy. The author has a habit of over-explaining things that can be easily inferred from the character’s dialogue and actions. Honestly, you could probably cut the word length in half if you removed all the redundant explanations and descriptions. 

Rolf seems a little… off. While the author pretty much nails every character down to a T, he hasn’t quite seemed to master writing Rolf (which is understandable, since he’s probably the hardest character to write in the show). But his dialogue just sounds a bit awkward and clumsy to me. 

But aside from those nit-picks, this story is pretty much flawless. And I haven’t even mentioned the emotional aspect of it. I don’t cry easily, but this story brought tears to my eyes. That final scene where the Eds are reunited in Eddy’s room together as the police sirens approach is both heartwarming and heartbreaking, since you know this will be the last time they see each other. And it’s also heartbreaking to see the kids _finally_ regret everything they did to the Eds, and finally wanting to be their friends (for real), but knowing that it’s too late. 

But the part that really got me was the Epilogue. Yes, there could’ve been a bit more closure, but it’s so emotional and well-written that I’m willing to forgive all its loose ends. I love how Ed remembers what Double-D had told him all those years ago, that one day Sarah would eventually realize that she loves Ed, and indeed they do finally love each other now. It’s very sweet and touching. Even little things, like the picture of Eddy’s brother, with a simple “Sorry” written on the back, suggesting he’s repenting all his abuse towards Eddy, and the picture of the three Eds smiling together innocently as young boys. And then there’s the haunting last line: “he tightened his grip on his sister as the noises of the city faded into the background, save for the distant sounds of sirens speeding off to some unknown tragedy”, ending the story on a chilling, bleak note. This story is really a masterpiece of fiction. 


End file.
